Well Pixie, I am most probably solidly casted in the stereotype guy that states the obvious. I also sometimes tell that joke that everybody knows, or make the same comment I made a hundred times before.

SORRY

Actually, we love to watch sport and drink a beer. We love it if our girlfriend come and sit on our lap or hold on to one of our arms. Its a kind of mental hibernation from carrying the problems of the world around our shoulders. And the only way to communicate during this phase of mental stagnation is opening our mouth to state our first observation, somehow connected to the person whose attention we would like to have.

Just ignore it and say, hallo sweetie, I am off to have a spa with the girls...

Stating The Obvious, Is It Lame or Just Human?

Being Malaysian, we are famously known for stating the obvious. But it is not a specific behaviour for only certain countries, stating the obvious is in fact a norm among humans.
Some say that it is just a way to start conversation, small talk or to break the silence when you don't have anything else to say.
Some say it is just the way we see things and being human we think we are greater than the others, including the other human beings as well. And us stating the obvious is just a way of showing we are helping others see it our way.
Some relate it to a biological, evolutionary basis or theory of evolution: That human are social animals - we have the need to let others know or aware of our presence, mood, health etc which were given by occasional sounds, which in our case is "small talk". Lets take cats, they meow for every single thing even when there is no need to meow at all. It is just the need to let others be aware that they are there. Existed! It is the need among mammals to be recognized. Yes we are indeed (as we all believe) rational animals but this will include not only being rational but also being animal.

Marvin; stating the obvious

I was drawn to think about Marvin, the character in The Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy, a novel by Douglas Adams and made into a movie. Marvin is a robot, or an android, that is created with GPP - Genuine People Personalities (personality prototype of a human. And as a human prototype he is obviously depressed a lot of times, stating and repeating the obvious! There's one part of the book that I like would to quote:

One of the things that Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about human beings was their habit of continually stating and repeating the obvious, as in "It's a nice day!", or "You're very tall", or "Oh dear you seem to have fallen down a thirty-foot well, are you alright?",  At first Ford had formed a theory to account for this strange behaviour. If human beings don't keep exercising their lips, he thought, their mouths probably seize up. After a few months' consideration and observation he abandoned this theory in favour of a new one. If they don't keep on exercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working. After a while he abandoned this one as well as being obstructively cynical and decided he quite liked human beings after all, but he always remained desperately worried about the terrible number of things they didn't know about.


Anyway, the moral is, for me stating the obvious is not lame at all. Yes of course I need to exercise my lips, and I was scared that if I stop talking my brain will actually freeze. But, it's a way of me showing that I am here, you can talk to me now. My starting of conversation might be lame but I am here, that is all that matters. So how about you? Do you agree or do you not agree?
Here is the video created by Malaysians on our way of stating the obvious. Enjoy!

Pixie.

We Write Our Own Luck

All of us sometimes feel that someone - be it our friend, our sibling, Hollywood celebrities or even foe is luckier than us. The grass is always greener on the other side. But have we ever thought of the road to this "luck". What bring these people "luck". We have in our culture various “ways” of getting "luck". Wake up on the right side of the bed, starting the new day with our right foot forward, wearing red, wearing a special pendant or what so ever. I tell you, that is all folk's tales. Maybe by doing all that, we can have A BIT of good energy around us. Mark the word "A BIT", but the impact is so little on a person’s luck. However, I don't deny that good energy or positive energy can result in a person being lucky. Positive energy creates positive attitudes and positive attitudes will attract positive ways of handling things - hence the success, but still how much it will change in the long run. For that I say WE WRITE OUR OWN LUCK!

Take Warren Buffet fo instance. He is the luckiest. He got all the money in the world. but what he did to get this luck. He started early. He even invest at the age of 4! Is that luck? I think it is pure genius and also a great way of showing - you write your own luck!

Maybe your example of being lucky is Kate Middleton. Married to a prince, future “Queen” of England, high fashion profile, beautiful, money and brain in the genes. But look back at her family history, it was more likely that they wrote their own luck. Her grandmother, Dorothy Goldsmith, or better know as "Lady Dorothy" worked herself up from poverty to prosperity and gained recognition of herself on the way. Her great grandmother, Edith Goldsmith, a widow with 6 children, held her family together in difficult times, struggling to make ends meet. But she instilled in her children a resourcefulness and drive for self-improvement. And Kate herself, being told by Prince William that he will put his study and his military career before her, which tells us that she is a tough type that doesn't depend on having luck by marrying a Prince, but is willing to take on a life full of responsibilities and hard work.

So, luck does not just fall from the sky. You have to work your way through to get the luck. And unfortunately, you can also write your own failure. It all depends on you. What are you going to write? Luck, or Failure? But always remember, a failure today, can be a luck tomorrow. There: Commonsense


Pixie Signing Out

He Says:


Well put Pixie.

Luck of today may be the sorrow of tomorrow. Just live your life and be free.

Nothing more to say...

Janneman

Sunday Blues - Do You Have It?

Today we talk about Sunday Blues. Those feelings that comes regularly or once in a while (for the more fortunate ones).

We all hate it if others get it. And we like to nurture it when we have it. So, I dedicate this commonsense post to depression.

How to handle someone that is depressed.

Goodness, what a question. This should be answered by a psychologist specializing in depression… But there are a few tips for us normal people:

Don’t be angry at people that are depressed. It’s like being angry at someone for being sick. It is not going to make them get better faster.

Offer to make them some tea or coffee. These two are universal cures for depression.

Always assure them that you are here and its ok for them to feel depressed for whatever reason, you may not support their reason, but you still love them and care for them.

How to help myself if I am depressed.

Make yourself a cup of coffee (or tea if you do not drink coffee).

Do something with your hands. (Clean, bake, draw, built, it does not matter). Stay busy with neutral things. Don’t drink too much alcohol. If you did and feel worse, drink more tea.

Walk or exercise. Listen to variety music.

I know it is difficult, but you have to consciously avoid negative thinking.

Remember, the reasons you feel depressed will not be solved while feeling depressed. Your problem solving skills shut down when depressed. Forget about what you “think” makes you depressed until you feel better. Then the solution may be simpler than you think.

Janneman


She Says:

I remember when I was 13 and just started at boarding school, I LOATHED Sunday.

Sunday used to be my favorite day. My grandmother will cook my favorite dish. My grandfather will buy me new book to read. And I've got my friends to play with me all day long. When I was sent to boarding school, everything ended. I was surrounded by people that was also having Sunday Blue like me. Some were really having bad homesick. At least, I was pretty good in controlling my emotion.

As a kid, you are very straight forward with your emotion. if you don't like something, you change. If you hurt, you cry, if you happy, you enjoy it. So, what make adults so difficult? We like to drift in our emotion, especially the bad one. We holding on to every single detail that making us blue in the first place. Is that making us feel better? No! People say, the only person that stopping you from feeling happy, is yourself. Why holding on to something that making you depress, CHANGE it!

Some Sunday, I feel blue myself but when I look at my partner, my kids, Sunday is the only day I am with them the whole day. Am I going to ruin it just because I want to "entertain" myself blue? Time fly so fast without we knowing it, don't fill it with feeling blue over something you can't change. Cherish it with laughter and memories. You get over the Sunday Blues in no time! Trust me, I know.

Pixie Signing Out!

This is how it works
You peer inside yourself
You take the things you like
And try to love the things you took
And then you take that love you made
And stick it into some
Someone else's heart
Pumping someone else's blood
And walking arm in arm
You hope it don't get harmed
But even if it does
You'll just do it all again

-Regina Spektor : On the Radio-

Birthday Present, Being Clueless and...Lazy?

Janneman asked me lastnight, what kind of present he should give to one of his staff as today is her birthday. Asking my opinion is one thing but assign me the task of thinking it for him before morning is compelling. Not that I mind, but when it comes to the "arty side" which is my way of describing feminine side, some men are born clueless. That is what I thought.

I have a friend, for her 28th birthday, her husband gave her a book on how to lose weight effectively. Where's the commonsense in that? Women don't want to be reminded on how fat they are, at least not on their birthday.

Now, talking about clueless. How do we tell whether a person is just lazy to think or really clueless. Let me give you three scenarios each to enlighten whether a person is really dumbfoundedly clueless or just stark lazy.

Clueless

1. They always the one who ask silly question, because they see things differently, and dont underestimate them, they are focus on their thing and might be the one who change the world.

2. They are not fond of the rules, not that they are rules breaker but it just that they dont even know some rules are existed.

3. They willing to listen, and keen to learn new things, being clueless make things interesting to them, even common one.

Lazy

1. A person who already have three children (doesn't matter man or woman) and still didn't know how to put on diapers.

2. A person who at the age of 40 and driving everyday, especially woman but still doesn't know how to change the tyres.

3. A person who is fulltime housewife or househusband that still cant change a live bulb.

People say that Compulsion is the first instinct of the clueless, so being clueless is a state of mind not an attitude. Lazy is the other way around. Lazy is when you didn't use commonsense when it cross you mind. Clueless is when you dont have commonsense. 

So, back to Janneman request. Is he lazy or clueless? I leave you to that.

Pixie signing out!

He Says:

Yesterday Pixie went with me to the gym. Earlier in the day she used my I-tunes account to buy an Afrikaans learning program - with my permission for a change. After walking for half an hour on the treadmill, she cluelessly followed my instructions on the iron pumping apparatus before pre-maturely excusing herself to a stationary bike. Being busy on a loud rowing machine, I did not notice the commotion around her. She was sitting on the bike (formed like a lazy chair), shouting out Afrikaans words. With her earplugs she did not realize the sound levels. Later on she showed me that the learning program had exercises, and in her frantic pursuit of top marks, she wanted to ensure the proper pronunciation and level for the sound recognition software I paid for.

So this brings me by a the question of the day:

How come sometimes I cannot hear others?

If you reduce the noise in your head, it may be easier to listen.

How to exercise in a Gym?

Enjoy it, be mindful of others, and don’t try to show-off.

Now back to Pixie’s post of the day.

Pixie, just because you can learn Afrikaans in a record time does not mean that my NOT LEARNING Malay in 14 years is because of a lack of trying. Being linguistically challenged is a form of cluelessness, not laziness.

Being unable to think of a present to buy for a staff member, that is a condition called “being male”. BUT:

Buying your wife a “how to loose weight” book for her birthday DEFINITELY shows “NO COMMONSENSE AT ALL”. To the poor bloke: As mentioned earlier in one of my posts, commonsense are lost to most of us at some time in our lives. That is why we are sharing this website.

Janneman

Circle, Being Fat and Duck Echoes?

Last year in September I registered the name www.freecommonsense.org, rented huge amounts of webspace and thought about all the money my website is going to make. For nine months my website only showed: This is My New Website, Hey! Welcome to my website. I wrote this code all by myself. Stay tuned. Sigh...

My girlfriend told me to use a blog instead of programming my own website, which I have never done before. But, but, but... That’s the point of this website. Commonsense sometimes get squashed by our own focussed excitement. It usually takes a lot of fun out of things, but can save us plenty of time and then maybe we can have more fun in later.

Okay, enough about my own lack of common sense. Lets start:

How many circles do you see?

Janneman's answer:

I can see 93

But I can also stick to one, two or 90, depending on my definition of a circle. Want me to explain? 

Well, its like this... Pixie: "What are you doing! You are going to bore the website static! Write interesting things for goodness sake".

Pixie ask me yesterday: Am I fat?

Here is the answer: We are all made up of two kinds of flesh that is changeable within limits to alter our physical appearance. Muscle and Fat. The correct relationship between the two is a matter for the medical professionals, so if you want to know the correct ratio for you, ask your doctor. My personal taste varies greatly according to your bone structure. (By then I received a well angled forehand right between my stomach muscle and rib cage), so I quickly altered my tune: Sweetheart, your fat/muscle ratio did not change, as far as I can see. 

Commonsense lesson: No women is going to see the humour in your comments about her weight.

Posted by anonymous:

What came first, the chicken or the egg?

Of course the chicken first

Why a duck quack does not echo?

It does not echo? That's strange, who said that? Common sense says that it most probably does echo, it is maybe just not so easy to hear the echo than other sounds

Is it true that if you bite your nails, you will face trouble sooner or later?

Nail biting is a sign of nervousness, so most probably this perception is formed because whatever is causing you to bite your nail, may result in trouble. Common sense say don't bite your nails because it is unsightly, and sort out your problems in a positive way.

Is it good to study through the night before an exam?

Common sense say that whatever makes you feel good and positive before the exam, so that you can give your best in the exam, should be the good thing for you to do. Janneman, however, fails to see how you will accomplish that by not having enough sleep.

Janneman

She Says:

Pertaining to the latest post "Circles, Being Fat and Duck Echoes", I would like to say a thing or two to Janneman from female point of view.
First of all, regarding the choice Janneman makes in trying to deal with website instead of just try out the blog first. Commonsensely, we test the market first before we decided on doing a website. But  man falls in the category of "never listen to the ladies", therefore it is correct that commonsense only exist from experience.
The second thing that I want to point out is regarding biting the nails syndrome that is familiar with the ladies. I find myself agree with Janneman that it is just the symptom of nerveousness, however, I can understand where this idea is coming from. I grew up with a very superstitious mom that believe in everything. For Asian mostly, to ensure that the younger generation stay put within the culture values, they create lots of belief such as biting nails can attract problems in our life.  Because of limited sources of education before, some trully believe it. But as we grow wiser especially the younger generation nowadays we come to realise that it doesn't make sense anymore. Problem comes in our life is not based on whether we bite our nails!

Stop biting your nails or it will end up like this.

Thats all for now, till we meet again,

love,
Pixie